This is the first time i ever have this come of Feeling...
Maybe is just too hard for me to accept ...failure..
Ya as always you can hear ppl say that , good thing never come easy..it's true the harder you can get the thing the more you will take care off =)...

Maybe i am just not enough of resistant to resist the incoming challenge..because for the past few years i never try hard for other more challenging stuff in the sector i own...everything come easy, lecturer do the talking and student do the writing...spoon feed as always ,like taking off a baby.

I felt i so naive for now to be the best , i doesn't showing that i am giving up..just i make mistake ,a serious mistake...If wanna to keep skill sharp ,you must train everyday and this is well-known by all people but how many peoples can do it?? i am definately not the 1..
As you can see , the basic of success is hard-work and come up with intelligent that own the world...I blame myself for not taking effort to find out more than what lecturer gave ...
Most of my coursemate know well assignment make their life miserable , but i realize that's a way to sharpen your thought ...
Simple -------why assignment have that kind of power...because when assignment come in, they own your thinking, they make you think as hard as you can to squeeze every parts of your brain..
But!!WHY it's so hard when come to assignment , because we used to spoon feed life ...without effort of finding we can get the source that's needed...

So now come into climax , i actually got stuck in some programming things...i got nearly my tears down..i cant afford to just lose to something that can fail me so easily...Over night and night i was thinking solution to get rid of that particular thing...

Yup there's a solution i have currently but is not the expected result that i wan...i wan it to in my way...even many ppl convince me to go for the shortcut first and get it on path after it's stable..i know it may seem to solve the problem easily but i dont wan !!because i wan back my own way , if people can do it then why i cant??

i am so desperate that i hope every tries can bring success, but it didnt..

conclusion?i still stuck half way, honestly ....i really never meet something that is so hard to solve..even for a assignment that is nearly impossible to find in library or internet , i manage to get it after 3-4 hours sitting on the chair and countless nights and days of finding...in my field always got problem with those electronic stuff that's out of the knowledge that you have...learn from troubleshooting then...without doubt i can say whenever there's a failure i dont lose hope because i belive things can go beyond complicated but human is born to solve it...Prove it then!!

=) i didnt lose hope either this time ...i find every1 that can help me, throughout forum and peoples...i will keep searching until the day i find it !!

When i find it i will....
***To Be Continued***

我相信只要不放弃，任何事都有可能实现。。
我太想念一个人，但因为学业和理想。。我把想念变成了一个期待，我偶尔会相信缘分。。只要我还有明天我依然能和她在一起。。。坐在向海的屋子里，手牵手想想我们有过的浪漫和开心。。
=) 我并不奢望有富有的未来，而是和某人一起过的未来。。我也不奢望有童话般的人生，只要开心就足够了。。

有时候当我在驾着我的车时，听到么首伤感的歌。。。我会不知觉的掉了几滴眼泪，其实我只需要一个人能有时在我身边陪我笑，一起吃晚餐 和一起说心事。。我的心里会有时觉的酸酸的，我有一个能寄托我心灵的人。但却像哑巴吃苦瓜，有苦说不出。。我不想把圆满的友情给摧毁而换来的是尴尬，所以我选择了只想不去争取。。

在我的事业里，我能不顾一切的去寻找答案，我能一直坚持我的原理直到我找到答案。。
感情上是相反的，不是说你肯付出对方就会有你所期待的回应。。。
不想了。。。。
这是我常常说的口边的，当然是假的啦。。。。。
不管我这么样厉害，人会有孤单的时候。。。不过我会去添满空虚的心灵，微笑代过一天一天的生活=)。。。
Belive happy that's never end ,belive things can go better than that...That's belive in myself that it never will be the same as always yet i will try out hard to maintain the way i wan it to be in my life...
I will go for my career while i waiting , i waiting the day when you will be by my side..

Today had been a nice day for me , oh nonono is nice day for my classmate in advanced electric circuit, finally our assignment that must be complete is 72 hours is up with no delay to our lecturer...i am not the one who do all the question , so i actually not really much to comment about how hard the question is as i didn't experience it by myself though...but can see from my friend eyes it's really really tough so i dont think i am better than them in calculation , and indeed they are my sifu that help me out in those mind twisting question..
Forget it.......
I tend to promise myself to deal with my assignment to chase up the due date with the work i had in my hands yesterday..but it doens't work,i feel so tired and dizzy ,and ended up gave up to accomplish my "mission"..
Maybe most of you experience something like this..............................
when you working hard for those homework or other stuff that you not really concern about most of the time..you will feel regret not being a good boy/girl study at home and do preparation and you have a strong will at that particular moment that appear in your mind "no matter how next time i will do much more better and i will start to be a good 1 from today onward", ended up after your work is done , you just left that so-called strong-will behind the mind and tend to forget it..same thing goes to me..
I dunno why feel so tired today, maybe is just lazy =/..i took a nap after i reach my house and woke up to eat my dinner before 8, after that i am here..i suddenly felt that actually i have nothing much to do with my laptop except some work that need to be done , some letters that my dad always call me to type and you-tube most probably?but i really dont get the full usage of this laptop..maybe i should think what should i do with what i have now ..
research?? i think is not a good time for the "well-being" of my result..
article about what i like?? i tends to just read half way and walk away..
what more ....
maybe i can dream about it tonight =P..

Since last month i saw a notice stick up on the notice board at PBA(Penang Buddhist Association) , they every 4 months will have a blood donation..Since 4 months ago , i donated my blood but because my blood pressure was too low, blood in the vein at that time flowing too slow,after 3 quater the nurse stop me from donating my blood and encourage me not to give up for next try..of cos i didnt give up,even the nurse sting both of my hand with a quite big "needle" ..i belive those who donate blood before will know how big it's compare to normal injection "needle"..lol sorry ya i forget what's de thing call so i just use needle to represent it..
I drove my car all the way to there , well to be honest i had experienced lost of direction at there , at first i walk on the sidewalks till a crowded place that hang up with "Medical Room" ..i though i was on the path to blood donation , but i quite curious that most of the people inside the room isn't youngster but another way quite number of them is upper age old folks ...dont get me wrong ,i doens't mean that old folks cannot donate blood ,i just curious why there's so many upper age men and women there , since i not in a rush ,i take my time to walk around and i saw a board with direction arrow BLOOD DONATIOn, i walk toward a big hall with front there a row of table and peoples sitting down to fill up some form..
TAKE A CLOSE LOOK @@.....

yup that form is for blood donation , happily i finally see the light out there after lost for quite a while..after finish fill up the form ..i walk toward a pharmacist i think and queue up to wait for my turn to be jabbed with a spike into the tip of middle finger..i look around while waiting , not a lot of people actually napping on the "bed" waiting to fill up the pack of empty plastic with blood..

When that's my turn , i get my weight on the list before i sit down on the chair..i asked "Erm sir sorry actually i am new comer here, so i dont have the small book", Pharmacist chuckled and turn to me "is ok , just have your seat first later on the people over there will give you a new book" ..hmm i think it's better to get jab with spike than take the blood sample from the "needle"..he said "this strike on your finger is pain, but dont worry later when donate wont be so pain" after that i sat down waiting for the doctor to get my blood pressure and details..

After i get the container for blood donation, i walk towards those "bed"? and nap like others did..Ahar this time is the same problem for the nurse to get my vein, if you were at my position and looking on your hand you will be terrify by the big thick needle pulling out and pushing in to find where's the vein to get my blood...i smile with the nurse and say "Very hard to find isn't it?" "i got my 2 hands stung last time but without successfully donate my blood" i continued...she look surprise and concentrate on the proccess that quite terrifying =/..until my blood is in the tube and flowing , i released a sigh..

No doubt my blood still flowing very slow like previous no matter how hard i squeeze the thing in my hand , they looked worried either ..my blood stop and flow stop and flow, i was worried either ..at last my container got filled up with O+ blood..i didnt know whether that bag of blood can be use for others or not because they didnt tell me anything before they left me alone...i hope it can help others with that bag of blood =)..

Certificate of blood donating?

i wanna fill all the gap below up next few years ....

P/S:Blood donation not only help people who need it and can save life also....of cos dont be so stingy or scare to donate, your hemoglobin will be destroy after some time then why dont you donate it instead of let it to be destroy..and it's good to donate once in a while as it also good for your body..

Things flow through life day over day, growing up .....xmas is going to be up soon enough,either for my final of semester 5...many things came to the end of this year, yet many upcoming things going to be done by us ,the youth and the future of the world =)..

Until yesterday i only realized how exhausted one people can go, yesterday i was doing my research for nothing ..I feel so helpless sometime when thing doesn't in my way that i wished it to be, but i wont give up ..i know it can be really really very hard , i having my hopes on my team , i am not going to face all thing by myself at least..

As what i learned from the team-building last saturday , the lesson revealed what path actually we been walking through this year or maybe this 19 years...the team-building about leadership , the whole teambuilding is all about understanding yourself ,your friends and indeed every1 you interact with everyday ...have you ever realize someday when you are telling your teamate to do his part but he just messing around and dont get into the job?? you pushing him/her all the way to get things done yet he/she not giving much response ?? It's normal...there's a idiom in BM "rambut sama-sama hitam , hati lain-lain" which mean although we are homosapiens , mind-set surely have some gap in between...styles ,ideas ,attitude and much more thing that i can list out..
Maybe another example will be good enough , have you ever watch any football match or basketball match ...AHAR!!BADMINTON (DOUBLE ) ..as you can see in a team maybe is just few of the player is playing very well and others may not in form or somewhat , if the gap or what we called it teamwork is not as good as opponents even you have the best player in your team it's not gonna to work forever to guard the victory ...Maybe in badminton you know that lee chong wei had play veery very well and all hopes fall on him, but try to imagine if one day lee chong wei team with a stranger that not as skillful as him or maybe just a amateur , do you think they can beat a team with boleh-cari-makan skill and have a stronghold between them?? definately it's uncertain or most probably lee chong wei that team will be torn apart ..

Back to real life , when come to assigment or whatsoever about project and so on...you will always seek for the team you normally form , as there's something special that inside your team ,what's the special that you can think about??and why dont you every time will find other peoples instead of your own friends?? because when come to doing stuff together your friend can understand your mind-set more than other ...they will do their job to help you to concentrate on your own job and not to worry about theirs..in between you and your team understand what they going to do ...

Dont pissed off when you facing your teamate that bringing you trouble , try to communicate with them and try to understand what they what instead of bring them into your world and tell them what you want...What if you are taking the role of a leader?? Not a big deal , try to stand on their position and think what actually they wan...Every things is the same ,they having the same basic /concept, when deal with human we need to think what they actually expect us to do , when come to deal with customer of cos it gonna be crashing ur skull to understand about what they might wan our service to be on , and it's hard to argue with customer as "customer always right!!" =)..

I am not enough to afford the responsible with my puny shoulder?
Then that's when esprit de corps come into =), remember you are not always alone , maybe not much friend you have or none , but everything is flexible in social life, communication skill either you have none?? then learn it from the people who is well-known with his interact among the crowd..many thing you didnt expect it can happen , but it can be real and concrete if you put your effort on it...

Investment is a buzzword of nowadays , not spending money is also saving money at the same time..of cos people like to use the money today than money after 10 years although the money after 10 years can be tremendous..but for me what i think important in a people or a company is not the modal they have to start off is the spirit of the follower ..many big company start off with 2 peoples until today a big company that well-spread over the world , Intel cooperation is a good exam ..For your information the founder of intel was from Fairchild semiconductor ..many not many people know what's fairchild semicon but surely every1 know what's intel processor pentium 4 ,dual-core, quad-core and so on so on..What they start off the business is not a big amount of money but is the will that they have in their mind to become a cooperation leader..working out hard with another partner and build the miracle that someone think is impossible!Investing in esprit de corps bring more outcome than investing your money into the bank for 3% or even more interest..

People look down on you , but it's not going to be affect your will to be success infront of them..they say impossible?!?! then show them what you have, there's so many well-known people you can find in the world that making miracle, they can do this miracle alone but people(s) that have the concept of strong bonding can do even better ..That's why teamwork own every impossible ,that's why esprit de corps showed us how important it's in our life =)...

EHERM, after long typing i am kinda of tired and i feel like i am banging the table and act like a boss =P...but if this post is getting into your mind then i dont mind to be the 1 banging table ..
Sorry for being boring here , but you know....talks about this kind of stuff always is boring just like chinese medicine that cure your illness wont be sweet like honey *winks*...

Ahar, one last thing.Any feedback pls post through >>> the box there..sorry for my poor english ,maybe i should go for a english class under Mr.Joshua Yam Went Thai .. =P hehe